The folder held the elder care attorney’s letter Nathaniel had commissioned, and it named the date of my surgery. They had not gone home over parking. They had a two o’clock appointment to review a capacity petition, and they left while I was still under so they would make it. Theodore had found it because he had been searching for me for eleven years and had reason to be careful.

I did not fight them. I changed my will, closed the joint account, and wrote each of my children one page telling them exactly what I knew and that I loved them anyway. Rowena telephoned nine days later and could not finish a sentence. She comes every Tuesday now, three years running, and has never asked me for a dollar since. The boys have not written.

Theodore takes me to lunch on the first Saturday of each month, and last spring he named the paediatric nutrition programme at the Sacramento hospital after my mother, who fed people through the Depression and taught me how.

The yellow card sits framed on my kitchen wall. I look at it when the house is quiet. A single person noticing you is not a small thing. It can hold up a whole life, and I have finally let myself believe that mine was worth noticing too.